Came back from one-month-long stay in a very religious country, Malaysia. Here there are Buddhism, Islam, Hinduism, Christianity…., all sorts of major religions out there. That also makes it, besides the different cultural influences, as a fascinating place to visit indeed.
I’m kind of non-religionist, don’t really believe in any kind of one God only.
Have I turned out happier or the other way round for that? As one non-religionist, I have no answer for that either.
I stop questioning about who I am, where do I come from, or what will I be, that sort of issues for long since grew up and grown older. Assumed that if I left those questions behind so it couldn’t bother me in face, therefore, I would, or pretend, enjoy life more.
Still, once in a while I kept questioning that what have I done deserved a second chance in this life, in terms of reincarnation that I couldn’t trust, what’s the purpose of the second chance I had anyway?
Have I ever be able to find my soul back since once lost it?
What makes me a human being after all? There is simply ever no easy answer for that I believe. It took me years to figure out.
Did it matter then, I ask myself? Or did it not become consoling to believe that death ended absolutely? What was I trying to recover? don't know yet.
But, somehow, in any perspective, have I found the balance in my life or have I been spoiled my life in some point for all these extra years I had for now? I couldn’t help wondering and keep looking for…..
Here I am, wondering here and wandering there on this planet still.
It is always a big sunshine above over the sky in Malaysia. Even so they do have raining season though.